Monday, December 20, 2004

Home again, home again...

"Home... is where I am not." LOL, My sister told me this on the drive home. I think its abou the best expression of how I feel right now. How do I miss the community, the ability to walk into a lobby or into Bill and find other people doing things, anything. Now I sit at home and remember all the reasons I left. I am actually considering not coming back for Christmas next year though I know not what else I would do.

Yes, I am home and hating a 56k connection, my computer stayed in my dorm room and therefore I have to remember all my passwords and such. Amanda, aka "sister" dropped me off yesterday, hung around for a bit and then headed off to work. She will be back on Thursday. Dad had to drive over to Carson City for something. Mom and Dad thought about going to Reno and staying the night last night on the way there. Invited me to come but I declined hoping that they would go and enjoy themselves. As usual they didn't want to motivate themselves to get up and moving, so nothing materialized.

Been vegging all day. Sleep and read. I have a stack of US News and World reports that hadn't been getting forwarded sitting in my room that I have been reading through. Brought a box of books from school too, but they probably won't get touched for a while. Ironic thing is that as I am regaining my rest, I am thinking about actually going out and doing things... and realizing that there is nothing to do. Dad took me off of the car insurance, so I can't drive. (There was no reason to keep spending $200 when I was only around for 6 weeks or so) This adds another reason to go to Seattle this summer, because living up here without a car STINKS! But other than the satellite TV (which is one nice thing), reading, sleeping and eating (a recipe for adding 5 holiday pounds), here isn't much to do. So to all reading this, comments and questions about life are encouraged as they will give me something to do. Your blogs will also be frequented regularly I have a feeling.

Toodles and Merry Christmas!

Friday, December 17, 2004

Finals... are.... Over

Semester is over. I don't yet know if this is a good thing. I passed all my classes. I still have to finish my Torrey Paper for one last revision. Its due at 5:00 pm today. We get kicked out of the dorms at 10 pm. I will be headed home at 5:00 am tomorrow.

Chest infections suck! I am coughing up all kinds of good stuff, the worst part is that I know what is going on medically (Its happened often enough) and can do nothing medicine-wise for it 'cept for the OTC meds I am on now.

What is it about this time of year? I am just so lonely for someone to think that I am special. Everyone else has a special someone in one form or another. Caleb has Danielle; it's going to be interesting to hear about him with out her. She is so good for him. Anyways back to where I was. It is this realy indecypherable paradox. Everyones like "Your a smart, talented, caring guy. Well trained in the domesticated arts. You cook, clean, you can even sew if you have too. Your enterprising and going some where." They say all these things... But yet somehow all my interpersonal relationships seem really one sided. It seems like me trying to be nice and caring to others. I take time for their needs, don't get me wrong I enjoy helping people, I enjoy it alot, but I don't see other doing the same and I wish I did. I don't know. Maybe I need to step out of myself. Maybe I am being too selfish. Who knows....

That does seem to be the bad thing about Biola though... There are so many attractive girls who are great. Christians... Really souled out Christian Ladies who want to change the world for Christ. But the last few I have talked to have all seemed to change. "Thing 1" as Timothy, Jason and I refer to her as, was amazing to talk to early on in the semester. I talked to her during the first part of this week and it seemed that she had changed drastically... Not necessarily for the better. There was a demeanor that almost scared me. Made me think though... If we had decided to date, would that change have happened? That would have been bad for a relationship. "Thing 2" seems to have moved on as well. Dispite her words about not wanting to be involved with anyone she seems to be spending a great deal of time with Jon. I understand that feelings change and she may have found something there that we didn't have. But its just like her actions don't seem to match her words that she told me... I have been trying to keep my distance from her as not to complicate the situation. But when we talked the one time after deciding that we didn't want to date, it was hard because I felt like I was doing the input. I was being the caring emotional part. Thats not the way its supposed to work. I'm the guy for crying out loud! I am supposed to be the emotionally retarded jerk, not the one who is doing most of the "checking up on the relationship" stuff. I don't want to play into the steriotype, but if me being sensitive causes her not to be, then what?

Spider Webs

i wish someone would care about my life
its not to hard, not really
no strings, not hear,
no spiderwebs to get caught up in
sticky trails of silk emotion.

(Why does no one comment on my posts?)

Sunday, December 12, 2004

Check out these wheels!

This is a film project my suite mate put togather.

http://www.bubbs.biola.edu/~thatcher/pimpout.html

He's a Film Major. The star of the production is the Resident Assistant for my Floor. Micah Keepin' it gangsta! Word up SURF!

Pre Med Medic

Saturday, December 11, 2004

Soul Ministry

Mint hot chocolate and cherry turnovers… Seriously, they mend my soul. It is a rare feeling indeed, the feeling I get of warmth that spreads through my body as I sip mint hot chocolate. Add the thin, delectable layers combined with the sweet, smooth filling of a cherry turn over and I am in culinary heaven. Some how when I am in a place no mater how stressful (I would know as finals are in full swing) the drink alone is enough to put my mind at ease and my soul at rest. How is it that baked goods and steaming cups of culinary and confectous delight can have such a great effect on me? Is it something that Starbucks spikes there drinks with? Some magical concoction that bubbles in a kettle in the back of their establishment that the barista must go and stir every once and a while?
There must be something in chocolate that affects our chemistry in order to have such a profound effect on us mere mortals

‘Tis the season! I walk everywhere and there is red and green and pine boughs and holly. There is something about Christmas that seems to resonate with most people. The community alone is a major factor in it. There is something special about being able to wish everyone “Merry Christmas!” as they pass you in at the grocery store or on campus. Sure there are the occasional Scrooge’s who dislike the holiday for what ever reason, the lack of political correctness, the over-commercialization or the theological inaccuracy of the holiday in regards to Christ’s actual birthday, but these people are no reason for the rest of us not to be full of Holiday cheer. So Merry Christmas... Speaking of which I get to go see the last showing of Torrey Theatre's Production of A Christmas Carol tommarrow!

Thursday, December 09, 2004

A new level of personal body armor

I was just asked if I thought that the armor that is issued to the soldiers is adaquate. I said from a medical perspective, the armor given is enough to prevent most life threatening injuries... The head is protected by the Kevlar Ballistic helmet and the majority of the body is covered in the standard flak vest. Frequently this protection is augumented with the addition of Wiley style ballistic eyewear and ceramic plates to the armor vest. These protective measures are life saving but as my previous post illistrated the damage to ones extremities. Other methods may be needed to protect ones extremities and the serious vulnerable points of the current protective material, e.g. the underarm areas of the current flak vest. Such advancements would add a great deal to the quality of life of a casualty after an injury.

The conversation at this point shifted into humor. When I began to meander into the area of further protection of ones person the lower body was taken into consideration along the lines of invcreased quality of life. The idea of a kevlar loin cloth came to mind and was soon extrapolated to a kilt. So there was a motion made that the United states army should addapt current protective equipment to include flak kilts. You could even have different camoflauge to go with different units much to the same extent of one clan tarten. "They may take our lives, but they may never take our FREEDOM!"

The blue face paint probably should be left out though...

On a personal note: I was just informed that two of my friends maintain their "Titanic Virginity." They have managed to make it through their miserable pathetic lives and deprived themselves of a movie. By no means, am I a Leonardo fan nor especially of the movie, but rather the prospect of avoiding a movie based purely on reputation is rather idiotic.

Must continue with my work now... I have to finish a number of essays, ugh!

PremedMedic

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

A veiw of Military Medicine

Hey All...
The New England Journal of Medicine just published an article on military medicine.

You can check out the Yahoo! Article here
There is another Yahoo! article about Navy Medicine here
The NEJM article can be found here
The Slide show of photos can be found here

This is for all of you who are considering Military Medicine or may have an interest or appreciation because you know someone involved (corpsman/medic/nurse/doctor). This is the way life works for us. I belong to a Combat Support Hospital very similar to the one pictured (luckily, we are not in Iraq). The remarks made about the limited number of doctors and surgeons is very true. However, something possibly left out by the article is the use of Physicians Assistants to suppliment the medical strength. If you have any further questions on this issue feel free to reply directly to me.

I will caution you that the slideshow on the website does contain some very graphic trauma photos. If you wish to see the infrastructure and avoid the blood and gore only veiw pictures # 1-4, 13-17,19 and 21 (there are some patients receiving care but no wounds).

PreMed Medic
91W Heathcare Specialist
US Army Reserve

Four things a man must learn to do
If He would make his record true:
To think without confusion clearly;
To love his fellow-man sincerely;
To act from honest motives purely;
Trust in God and Heaven securely.
-- Henry Van Dyke, "Four Things,"

Wednesday, October 06, 2004

Shaken' loose.

Well I had to wait six months but Uncle Sam has finally decided to do something with my unit. For those of you that don't know, I am a Combat Medic in the Army Reserve and a member of the 328th Combat Support Hospital (Think the old TV show MASH). The Army had us on ALERT status (The first of five steps of deployment, the last step being landing in Baghdad or wherever) and told us to "be ready" because we could receive a mission at any time. Well they finally decided to send part of my unit to Germany. I am not among them. However, if they have decided that we can be better used in pieces than as an entire unit than that means that I could get split off from the main unit and sent to God only knows where. So please pray for the health and peace of the members of the 328th that are going over, that God would be glorified in this. For me, please pray that His Will is done. It’s relatively reassuring to know that I have no part in this decision. It’s totally a God thing if I have to go or not. My will can't get in the way. All I can do now though is be obedient to my immediate calling of being a student here at Biola and prayerfully await anything else.

My Dante Quiz results

The Dante's Inferno Test has sent you to Purgatory!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
LevelScore
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Extreme
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)High
Level 2 (Lustful)Low
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Very Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Very Low
Level 7 (Violent)Very Low
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Low
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Very Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Sunday, October 03, 2004


Took this with my phone Posted by Hello

My Senior Year Picture Posted by Hello

Oh, The Depths One Sinks Too.

Well here comes another week...

I guess I need to introduce my roommate to the wide and wild world of blogging. Troy is a great guy. He got the comment that he looks like Luke Skywalker in "Star Wars: A New Hope." I guess it’s the long blond hair... He is bible major, a "God major" as we joked tonight at dinner. He stays up late. Well, later, than I do anyway. He feels that he needs to be very conscious of his studies; I don't think school comes as easy to him as it does to me.

Anyway, he was out on a GYRAD (Get Your Roommate A Date) with one of the girls (For Possible Future Reference: Hayley) all yesterday so I avoided my room. There’s just too much temptation to be hanging out in my room all day with him not here. That may sound weird; it is my room and all... It should be fine. I have just found out that being here with him gone is just asking for trouble... Well then I proved today that it is. He took off a few hours ago and temptation and sin struck like a coiled viper. It continues to amaze me how my human nature is so vulnerable from all angles especially without someone watching over my shoulder.

Speaking of GYRAD's ours is the 16th of October... I have to think of some one who is "Totally sold out for God" for Troy... I don't know who Troy will hook me up with. That’s the fun part, it’s a secret. We are going to the Getty Art Museum and Ice-cream afterwards. It will be fun and a good time will be had by all.

I have discovered that my daily Bible study (I have decided that is my first priority in the mornings) or staying out of my room when Troy isn't here just isn't enough. I have to take a proactive approach to handling this problem. Please continue to pray for me because this is a new phase of this spiritual battle and though I know that God will win the war... I don't want to be a casualty.

I felt really weird the last few days... Mostly chock it up to the demonic attack I am currently experiencing, but I have just had so much clouded in my mind that I really felt muddled and fuzzy. In addition I felt weak emotionally. I wanted to talk to Brittany (Introduction later) but was really afraid of making a physical move that would injure the relationship. (We agreed that we wouldn't touch [affectionately] or date during our first year here). Luckily, I was able to go up and straighten some stuff out with her on Sat.

I finally got my Acaza (www.acaza.com) Streaming Radio working... This way I don't have the distraction of iTunes up the whole time as I study but still have "good" Christian music that is varied and upbeat. (Yes, there is Rap and Hip Hop... I can hang, G! LOL)

I am slowly realizing that this is a healthy thing... It's probably not as healthy as talking to a good friend. But it suffices for now... I frequently wonder why I don't open up to Troy more, but we have very different backgrounds, interests and styles; maybe I am just not working hard enough at it. We have bursts of spontaneity that are great when we just have a great spiritual discussion or how we are doing.... But it seems that we are just traveling in different circles and schedules. Need to seek the Lord's guidance on that one...

I just remembered I have to be at Life guarding early tomorrow... 9:00 am. That will be fun. We get to watch the Life guard Videos... Actually that Means I can sleep in because I will be able to eat in class! Yeah! LOL.... Silver Linings and all.

Finished off "Phaedo" tonight. Still have Chem. to do before bed. Socrates is an admirable guy... Doesn't get it totally right but comes so close to the Truth that it is painful. Apparently some of the upper class Torrey Chums say that some of the stuff we read later says that Plato gets so close to his search for Truth that he is "saved." Raises an interesting question about the sanctification of pre-Christ gentiles, are they all condemned to Hell because of the fact that chronologically God wasn't speaking to the Gentiles at that point?

The last section of the book is eerily Catholic, with Tarterus being Hell and the rivers as Purgatory and finally ascension. There is a big thrust at re-incarnation, with the way that the deathless soul and indestructible soul being described. It will be interesting to continue. "Symposium" is due Thursday. Then, "Republic" after that for the next three sessions (Tuesday afternoons, Thursday Afternoons). Time to get on with Chem... Probably take me up to Bedtime.

Sunday, September 26, 2004

Time keeps slipping, sliping...

I am not really sure how much time I want to put into this... But I think that it will be a good thing to have. Especially for those moments when I need to vent...

Right now I don’t really feel like reading Meno like I probably need too. I have until Thursday, but I really shouldn't put it off.

I wrote a nice long letter to the editor of The Chimes (For the uninitiated non-Biola people that is the school newspaper) that I will post at the end.

I read on Foxnews.com today that Prince Harry is going to join the British navy. I had to ask one of the guys on my dorm, "would that work in the US? To have the son of the president in the military?" (not specifically looking at the G. W. Bush debacle.) I had the son of an ambassador in my AIT class for Combat Medic School and there was all kind of problems with that. It just makes me wonder if it is actually the position of the relative that is the problem for the kid or is it the upbringing of the kid because of the parents position that makes for bad situations? Will Harry's upbringing, with weekends in Buckingham Palace, etc. adequately prepare him for military life? Will his instructors and superiors compensate or discriminate for that upbringing? Lots of fun questions regarding that situation. Think that I wrote enough for today.

I am now going to post that letter I wrote...

To whom it may concern;

I have attended Biola University for nearly five weeks now and have read all of the published issues of “The Chimes” to date. I am impressed with the overall look of the paper and I recognize the staff’s struggle to present a professional appearance. I have a few but specific issues that I would like to address; the obvious gender dominance in the staff and its affect on story choice and portrayal, the a few obvious errors in spelling or accuracy, and the use of a picture of several magazines in a cover photo when you go on to decry the magazines place in the Biola community due to their picture content..

I spoke with one of “The Chimes” students as they were administering a survey of church attendance, about the disproportionate number of guys to gals on the staff and received the following response, “Do we hire guys who are less enthusiastic or less skilled, or girls who are enthusiastic and excellent writers?” The individual makes a very valid point that skill and enthusiasm should have greater precedence in staffing than gender. However, to do that they assume that guys are less enthusiastic and less skilled than girls in that area. The bias makes itself known in predominantly in the choices of sources for articles rather than in the articles themselves. For example, the furniture article in this week’s edition, the interviewed students were 3 female to one male, the subjects of the photo were female. This is not to say that gender has anything to do with furniture, but rather to point out a subtle trend that transcends furniture and leave guys feeling a little disenfranchised. Toss in relatively polar argument pieces like “Should guys wear shirts?” and “Pornography issues on campus” and this subtle trend becomes a very easy escape mechanism for the skeptics to completely blow off a good piece of journalism as a “sexist rant.”

While small, the errors in question are an issue more because of their placement rather than frequency. For example, in your Campus Talk piece two weeks ago you quoted a student as having been “at the Homor reading.” The mistake was blatant only because it was set apart from the page and in bold type. The second instance is on the most recent addition and I think deserves an article of clarification, along with a possible explanation of what the “Reserve/Guard” commitment entails (I am a reservist and wouldn’t mind writing that article if possible). It is highly doubtful that Specialist Leon is in an “Arisol” unit, but rather is being deployed with an “Air Assault Infantry” unit such as the 101st Airborne Division. For a photo caption that was above the fold on the front page, this was a mistake that should have been resolved with the source way before publication. The last point, which shares a
general public outcry, is rather multifaceted as it must deal with the photograph and the article in question. First, the rational for such a photo to be published let alone center of the front page escapes me. What is the point made by illustrating a weakness among a portion of the student body by publishing a photo that feeds that weakness? Second, the scope of the article surprised me, as the article chose to demonstrate a pervasive problem with a very limited example. That example, I feel was not adequate to describe the immensity of the problem and rather could have confused readers who had a limited understanding of the problem to begin with. Lust is a major issue both in our nation and on Biola campus, it is not bound by gender nor is it limited to the printed page. There was very little light shed on the roots of the problem itself. Take for example the recent New York Times Magazine article, the author sought out a member of the Biola Community who was a homosexual in an effort to get to a deeper understanding of the issue, not just what the school had to say or the average student, but rather by one who is affected. There are a number of resources that could have been tapped as a source, anonymously if necessary. I would like to repeat that I am very impressed with the dedication of The Chimes to being a good newspaper. I think that in many ways you have seceded. I just encourage you to take it up-a-notch. Go deeper with your stories. Diversify and step out of your comfort zones, I believe it will make for better writers, better reading and a better paper.